Francesca Battistelli and I are two peas.

If you've never heard Francesca Battistelli's "Free to be me"... you're going to want to youtube that really quickly to give you a sense of how I feel today. 

I like to think I have it all together.

My pre-test routine goes as follows:

-wake up at 5 

-shower and get my act together

-go to starbucks and get a multigrain bagel with butter and a coffee

-study @ sbucks until 7 when school opens

-go to school and study until 8... exam time.

I've become neurotic about my pretest "flow." I don't ever remember being this weird during undergrad. Anyway, all this to say, I've got a system and I expect it to be uninterrupted. 

Being that today was a test day, my test taking machine was on full blast by 5:30. After my exam I had a little more than an hour to kill before my next lecture. Since I was up so late last night on account of being ill prepared for the exam, and due to early rising, I decided that a nap was in order. Driving home I was formulating my plan... my PLAAANNN!! There is always a plan: 
Nap for 20
curl my hair-10 min
throw all my junk in a bag for the rest of the evening (i'm trying to avoid driving home 4 times a day and funding the palaces of arab princes)
race out the door and to class by 10

All was going well: napped, junk in bag, hair curled with about 1 minute to spare. I was down to the very last moment that I knew I could leave the house and not be late to class. then it happened. I raced out the door, slammed it shut and immediately realized I didn't have my keys. "noooooooo!!!!!!" I tried to start my car without the keys... just for fun. No luck. 

My really great, well-thought-out plan did NOT allow time for such a delay. For the first few minutes of my lock out, I thought that there was still the smallest chance I could make it. I checked the front door, then the back door -then did it AGAIN. Then checked the mailbox for a key, which was there, but it didn't work in our new locks. I had been defeated both by vanity and by hastiness. As it turns out, the defeat that I felt wasn't actually defeating, it was more liberating. I had escaped my plan! Or rather, the plan had gone on without me.

The most hilarious aspect of this story is the why I had to get back to class. I had a meeting at 12:30 in which I was running for an officer position in CMDA (Christian Medical Dental Association) on campus. In order to insert my name for candidacy, I had to write a letter of intent. Here is a direct exert: "I’m very organized and am timely in all things..."...as I am locked out of my house in the rain with no hope of making it to the meeting in either an organized OR a timely fashion. 

For the next 20 minutes, I stood in my heels in the rain in the back yard trying to pry open my roommates window. Remember that part about me curling my hair which ended up in me running late which ended up getting me locked out of the house? Right. The rain promptly took care of that. Fortunately, I was able to hoist myself into her window once I jimmied the screen open. Her pug named Sam was sitting in her room staring back at me. Best scene ever: crazy lady soaking wet, half in the window, half out, talking to black pug saying , "sammy! you couldn't help me out buddy?" while Sam just stares, like "this is who i'm forced to live with."

Already late for class, I drove down town (after I had pulled myself together) and got a delicious hot tea. Back to reality and somewhat sad to be leaving my adventure, I drove to school and waited for the next hour of class to commence. As I was waiting to enter lecture, I looked down at my nicely pressed black dress pants. Across both thighs was a white-ish, chalky residue from teeter-tottering myself on the window sill. It looked like someone had taken a chalkboard eraser and drawn it across my lap from left to right. NICE. In a funny way, it was a great reminder that although I had made it back into the hum drum of school, the adventure lived on. I liked that. 

God is all over this edition of life with Sara. If you haven't spent time in the word yet today, or are feeling that you are like me sometimes, always on the run, perhaps today would be a good time to slow down and think about how God is trying to teach you to deccelerate, relax and enjoy the blessings he's bestowed upon you.

While you were out...

it's been a while.

I have struggled with the purpose of this blog. Why write about yourself?? to prove to the world how narcissistic one can be? Hence the radio silence. As I reread through some of my previous entries, it became very clear to me that this was not only a way to keep in touch with so many important people in my life, but more importantly, a way for me to organize my thoughts and feelings. Feelings can be quite a messy affair, indeed. 

Much has happened in the nearly ten month lapse since my last post. As was mentioned last May, Kadan left on a business trip to Germany that will continue until June of this year, at which point he'll be relocating to a more exciting destination. I have taken up residence in Spartanburg, South Carolina and am becoming more of the charming Southern Belle I was destined to be. FALSE. I talk about poop far more than anyone needs to or should. Oh well... there are a few areas in my life that might require a little more refining. 

inadequacy

Upon matriculation at Edward Via College of Osteopathic Medicine, aka, VCOM, I wrestled with being inadequate. I was convinced that a career in medicine would be a stretch, a struggle, and would be a game of survivor. Could I make it to the next block of curriculum? It turns out that saying "Jumping in with both feet" in reference to medical school is actually a euphemism a for jaw rattling, skin searing belly flop into the deep end of never ending school work and study. But this is not a place for me to list my woes on the hardship of the INCREDIBLE BLESSING TO BE IN SCHOOL AND GETTING AN EDUCATION THAT MOST PEOPLE ARE NOT AFFORDED THE OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE. i'm not sure i constructed that sentence good. anyway... the point is, that after failing my first test... ever... God showed me what it meant to be dedicated to school. He was forcing me to commit 100% to the career path that I've chosen. (My future patients should thank Him.) After a month or two feeling totally inadequate and wondering why the Lord would have chosen me to be here, I started to see the ways that He had prepared me exceptionally for this trial. 

a best friend visit can change everything.

At the end of September, ol' Al Pal came to visit. it was the bomb. I was so blessed by her being here! I know so many others would love to come and visit also, but the fact that she was willing to take some days off of work in order to be here was incredible. I AM BLESSED TO HAVE HER. So is Alan... I'll remind him of that. Also, we flattened pennies on the railroad tracks and i felt like the world's best urban mom.

Coated in White, D. O.

Mom and Pops

That's right. It's in white. As a reward for making it through your first block in medical school, students are awarded their official "white coat." My wonderful parents DROVE down from NY to be here!! I was also so pleased to have my sister, broseph and niece in attendance.

My roommate Mia

C-money, A man, Gav.

out on a limb, up on a rock.

I started going to the local climbing gym in October. I love the climbing gym. God has given me a wonderful place to be myself, to enjoy the company of others and to do something I love. It is a wonderful respite from the daily drudgery and my life here would be (and was) sorely lacking without it's presence. I am SO thankful for the AMAZING people God has blessed me with. Have I said that enough, yet??? Such a truly amazing place with amazing people amazing amazing wonderful the best blessed so great how do i describe it amazing. Bah! God is good. He's made some pretty cool people and I'm so glad I can call them my buddies. I'm learning a lot...

the BEST Christmas gifts

K$ came home for Christmas... we experienced life as a married couple again, and i was reminded of how much I love him. He is one of the coolest dudes I've ever seen. Beautiful, quippy, smart, reserved, and boy can he encourage. I'm learning to appreciate things I didn't know about him... ie- somewhere along the line, he became very sensitive and loving. There is something SO special and precious about being on the receiving end of love and from a person who shows emotion to so few. I tell you what, the heart can only take so much. Each time we say "adios" it's as if my heart ruptures again and again and it gushes. then nothing. stone. no feeling. this is our life now.

Dear sweet romeo treated me to a photo shoot for Christmas...don't be fooled by our grimaces... we're quite pleased to be here. I promise. 

hostess with the mostest???

My buddy Ben from the gym has given me the opportunity to show love by hosting his fiancee, Anna,  for the weekend. It is amazing. I wish we could spend more time chatting! She will be moving to Sburg soon and it will be so nice to have her here! I'm so pleased that I could show hospitality and that a friend of a few weeks would feel comfortable to ask me. HOW GREAT. I've always wanted to have one of those houses where there is always a place for someone to crash. Letting people into my life, and others letting me into theirs is so special. 

The literary eloquence has dropped off significantly since the start of this post, but alas, I'm tired, and who really cares???

So to sum upppppp:

We moved around again

school started, Dr. bound---heyoooo

bestie came for a visit

parents came for a visit

climbing changed my life... or rather... my friends did

kadan. hearts hurting/wonderful love

Love through hospitality

So thankful for how God sustains me through these times with amazing family and amazing friends.. AND so thankful that He doesn't reveal His plan to us all at once.